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“Serving as executor of my parents’ estate was the worst job I ever had. To this day, my sisters won’t speak to me.”

Sound familiar? Sibling rivalry, jealousies, unfinished business between children and deceased parents, and injustices (real or imagined) within families combine to create a headache for financial planners, estate attorneys, or anyone assisting with inheritance and estates.

“Two children of the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. have filed a lawsuit against a third, embroiling the family in a dispute over his estate.” — Associated Press, 7/12/08.

The death of one’s parents, spouse, or other loved one, along with divorce, represent inflection points in life that often cause people to question and reevaluate themselves. Attitudes about money occupy a central role in this and can create an emotional minefield. Questions such as: “How does money change how I view myself, how others view me, my identity, and my course in life?” need to be explored in order that the inflection moves one in a positive direction.